Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and Mary Poppins star Dick Van Dyke has apparently been rescued from the jaws of death by, yes, porpoises.
According to The Guardian, the 84-year-old actor had to rely on the help of a pod of porpoises after apparently dozing off aboard his surfboard.
He told reporters: "I woke up out of sight of land. I started paddling with the swells and I started seeing fins swimming around me and I thought 'I'm dead!'"
Wowsers.
He went on: "They turned out to be porpoises. And they pushed me all the way to shore."
Yeah. And a dog ate my homework.
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